Team Names

The request for blogging has been overwhelming, so this week I'm back with my commentary on team names.

Rahman's Noodles
A shout out to our very own Dean Rahman and a clever play on words. If you don't understand, then you obviously did not have the same college experience that I did. Ramen is a japanese noodle dish that originated in China (god i love wikipedia). Nissin manufactures Top Ramen which is instant noodles that come in a little microwavable container. All you do is add water, zap it for 3 minutes, and you have a fine japanese cuisine. The thought of eating these things quite honestly makes me a littly queasy. I probably consumed a metric ton of instant noodles over the first two years of college between the hours of 2am and 4am. After doing what I did on a normal college night, my judgment wasobviously cloudy and it seemed like a good thing to eat these things before bed. Trust me, it's not a good idea. Don't ever try it. Even if it's a dare.


Naked Authority
The girls have been running strong with this name since 1L year. It's a solid team name. In a legal sense, naked authority is “one given without any right in the agent, and wholly for the benefit of the principal.” In a real world sense, naked authority probably involves some type of bondage, a midget, and a ZJ (if you gotta ask, you can afford one). That's just what I heard from a close source of mine. I wouldn't advise googling the term unless you're somewhere private with with a door that locks and no chance that someone will walk in on you.

Hung Jurists
Easily one of the best names in the league. And I'm going to stop there before this gets weird.

The Pac
I'm not sure where this team was going with their name. Is it a play on the "Rat Pack" from the 60s? I guess Orlando (formerly known as Alex) Woodson could resemble a young Sammy Davis Jr. if he were able to grow a moustache. I wouldn't disrespect Sinatra or Dean Martin by comparing them to anyone on the rest of the team. I've also heard them refer to themselves as "Pac Frat." Maybe they've started their own fraternity to compete with PAD. It'll be interesting to see whether they can pull some members from PAD. I've heard pledging for PAD is intensive.

Straight Cash Homeys
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=07G23zMGa4g
This explains it all.

The Fighting Pacifists
Pacifists don't fight. I don't get it. I'm so confused.

2 Girls, 1 Ball
This is the most interesting name in the league with its slight sexual overtone on one hand and regretful plight on the other. 2 Girls = every man's fantasy. 1 Ball = every man's nightmare. Maybe the team name just refers to the 2 girls on the field and the 1 football and not everyone in the world has a corrupt mind like myself. Either way...well played.

Ball Handlers
No confusion here. This is clearly a sexual reference from this clever and catty 3L girls team. It's really quite simple if you think about it. Girls handling balls. Except it's their team name for flag football. So they handle footballs, not real balls. Get it? Ok good. I'm considering joining this team next year so I can get a jersey. And possibly go the team sleepover on saturday nights in which the ladies bake cookies and have pillow fights...cause that's what girls do when they have sleepovers right? If it's not, just let me hold on to that thought.

Breakfast is for Closers
Now I've been slightly confused about this team name since I created the schedule. The confusion is based off the fact that Corey Pollard is the team captain and undoubtebly contributed to the team name. I expect more from Corey "C-Mony" Pollard, being the avid reader of The G Manifesto (http://www.thegmanifesto.com/) that is he. He should know that true Gs NEVER stay for breakfast.

The Prosecution
In my opinion, a pretty lackluster attempt at a legal flag football name. Here are a few equally mediocre team name options: The Plaintiff, The Defense, Adverse Possession, The Beneficiary. I expect more from you guys next semester as you will have had a whole semester of law school classes chalk full of legal terms that can be turned into witty flag football names. Until then...

WWR
Ok so I couldn't find the sheet with the full team name, so I'm not exactly sure what the acronym stands for or even if it is an acronym. If it is an acronym, maybe it means "Wrongful Waiver of Rights" or "What? Whoa! Res Gestae?" Maybe there's actually a missing D and the team name stands for "What Would Rahman Do?" After all Dean Rahman does have 1 team name in her honor...and a sweet profile pic.

ME
Ahh the commish's team. People have been getting the wrong impression about MY team's name. I did not name the team ME because I think i'm the whole team. First, I wouldn't have the pomposity to do such a thing (side note: I stole the word pomposity from Brian R. Mills, who is the only kid pompous enough to actually use the word. He would like everyone to know that he no longer wishes to be referred to as BMills. Instead he will only go by B.R...because it sounds more stately than BMills). Now, back to my team....Second, every single person is an integral part of our team. Considering we rarely have more than 4 people show up to the game, without any single person, we would have forfeited half our games. Also, since I'm commish it was much easier to just say ME when I dictated the schedule to my scribe. Well done on my part.